Savoir-Faire

Many providers take the time to write behavioral guides for their clients. I wanted to lay out rules of engagement for both of us. This way, I can be confident you’ll treat me well, and you’ll know what to expect from me in return. Our time together will be so much better when we both agree on these points.

Regarding Relationship Boundaries:

Our sessions will be emotionally and erotically intense, but it’s important that we both remember the professional limitations of our relationship and act accordingly. Many of the below points are written with this in mind!

Because our relationship is professional, we don’t have the implicit consent that most romantic or sexual partners do. It’s therefore important that we get explicit consent from each other. This usually takes the form of pre-session negotiations. If, during the course of our time together, either of us would like to try something we haven’t discussed, it’s important to talk about it first. If either of us wants to revoke consent, we can use the safeword ‘red’ or an agreed-upon safe action, like dropping a metal object while bound and gagged.

Regarding Personal Questions and Comments:

I love getting to know a new playmate, and I hope you’ll want to get to know me, too. The professional nature of our relationship means certain topics are off-limit, though.  I promise never to ask you about your family life or make rude comments about your body (unless you’re into that!) and I ask that you show me the same courtesy.

Regarding Discretion:

I take all pains to protect your privacy and will never mention you to others. I am especially careful with any personal information you may send as part of the screening process (see below). You may give me word-of-mouth publicity, but if you see me outside of an appointment, I ask that you pretend you don’t know me. I will do the same for you.

Regarding Screening and Safety:

Like most adult service providers, I require some form of screening to protect my safety in what is unfortunately a higher risk industry. I offer several options to ensure there is one that meets your preferences, including asking for 2+ references from other providers or a public social meet at a bar or coffee shop. This social time will take place on a different date than our session (since it is, part of the process of figuring out if I feel comfortable sessioning with you). Because this requires a signficant time commitment from me, I ask for $150/hr for these social meet-ups.

Regarding Deposits and Cancellations:

Like most independent adult services providers, I require a deposit to secure my time. This partial prepayment ensures I still receive some compensation should you have to cancel on short notice. I only ask for this deposit from new submissives; after that, I will trust you to respect the value of my time. The deposit is generally nonrefundable. However, If you need to cancel with less than 48 hours’ notice, as occasionally happens, I will allow you to reschedule once for a mutually agreeable time in the next two weeks without forfeiting the deposit. If I need to cancel with less than 48 hours’ notice, as rarely happens, I will give you the option to reschedule for a mutually agreeable time in the next two weeks or have me return the deposit. 

Regarding Timeliness:

It’s crucial that we both arrive on time. If we’re meeting at my incall, you may arrive up to ten minutes beforehand. Do contact me if you’re running late, so that I know you’re on your way!

Regarding Hygiene:

I am always freshly showered for our sessions, and it’s important for you to be as well. If it’s been more than a few hours since you’ve washed up– if, for example, you’re coming from work after a long day – you can arrive a few minutes early to use the shower. If you’re in a rush, I always have baby wipes and mouth wash on hand.

Regarding Tips and Gifts:

Regarding Reviews and References:

Reputations are of great worth in the BDSM scene. I will therefore try to talk to you before giving you a poor reference (unless you’ve been abusive, in which case I will cut off contact.) In return, I ask that you try to talk to me before giving me a poor review/ testimonial (unless your complaint is about something that is out of my control). I also ask that you not review me on websites like TER that are designed for escorts rather than dominatrices. It may give others the wrong idea about what services I offer.

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